Archive for Pop Culture

In the Drink by Kate Christensen Made Me Want to Drink…Heavily (and not in a good way)

I just finished one of the worst books I’ve ever read– Kate Christensen’s In the Drink. First of all, I hate when books slap a big quote saying “laugh out loud funny!” on the front cover. Don’t do that unless you’re funny. If you want to laugh out loud, don’t read this… go read The Girl’s Guide to Hunting and Fishing.

Besides being misleading, the plot is trite and already overdone. Girl in her twenties has a rich, overbearing boss and thinks she’s in love with her best friend, who may or may not be gay. Oh, and she drinks sometimes… not nearly enough to procure the title.

While the writing is good (better than most in the chick lit genre), the character development lacks all those elements that make a reader fall in love with a protagonist. Claudia Steiner was kind of this, maybe that, but nothing definitively. She whined, she begged, she droned on and on about roaches, she went into the details of constipation. I understand she was meant to be an anti-heroine, but still, she didn’t feel at all relateable.

The ending was the worst. Just when you thought the plot might actually go somewhere the author drops in a plot twist that was more of a plot sharp turn to the left and “see ya later.” At the point, the book lost all its integrity with me, but I only had 5 more pages so I forged on to the last page that left me thinking “thank God I didn’t spend my money on this book.”

Rating: * (for good measure)

Advertisements

Where I Save Your Time and Mine

‘ello, mates! Long time no blog, yeah?!

So, news flash, I moved to Australia instead of D.C.– or at least I picked up a half-assed Down Under accent in the week and a half I’ve been missing from the blogosphere. But you know what, I have excuses. Good ones. And excuses mean stories, so deal with the absence, sit back, and enjoy the ride.

You know what, scratch that. I’m going to make this easy for both you and me. I’m busy, you’re busy, there are not enough hours in the day for me to ramble on in a 1,287 word blog post explaining the whirlwind of a week I’ve just had, so I’m going to bullet important headlines and you can choose what you want to read or skip based on your allotted procrastination schedule (yeah, that’s right, I’m onto you and your procrastination, you Sneaky McWorksuckssons). This also gives me the excuse to include more of those adorable swirly bullets that I adore so much. (Those reading in a feeder, you’re missing out, I swear.)

  • The Move from Florida to D.C. – After an 11-hour car ride with my mom, stepdad, and two brothers, I made it to D.C. alive. There was a brief moment when I thought a cleaning woman would find my half-deteriorated corpse sometime in late August when she finally decided to return to her shitty job because her husband Earl got fired from the Santee, South Carolina textile mill, a thought that stems mainly from my grandparents’ debilitating desire to spend no more than $65 per night on a hotel room (and that’s including the AAA discount). Anyway, we escaped the Migrant Workers’ Budget Inn without a scrape and with all of my belongings still in our possession. Onward to DC!
  • The Apartment – My new home is a slew of adjectives that the Webster’s thesaurus would list next to the word “amazing.” Beautiful views of downtown Alexandria? Check. Balcony overlooking a courtyard? Check. Huge room with tons of storage space? Check. Running water and electricity? Check. Across the street from the metro? Check. I took tons of pictures to show you my new place, but unfortunately I left the cable cord to my digi camera back in Florida.
  • The Job – I’ve only been here five days, but so far I enjoy my work and my co-workers. I had to sign tons of paperwork promising I would respect the confidentiality of my clients since I’m working in government affairs, but so far the actual work has been very intriguing. Oh, and did I mention that I get paid to read newspapers and peruse my google reader? This job is perfect for a nerd like me.
  • Boys – I made out with a lawyer 10 years older than me with bad hair and a good body. I didn’t realize how much older than me he was until he accepted my facebook request. Facebook ruins my life. I called S., which was a huge mistake. I won’t go into the embarrassing details of the voice mail I left, but let’s just say that it makes me wince to think about. Needless to say, he never called me back. Last night, I signed onto the life ruiner a.k.a. facebook to see that S. had poked me. Poked me?! Why do guys think that is a substantial form of communication? Then today while at work, he IM’d me to tell me that he had a very good reason for not calling me back and that “good things that come to those who are patient, sweetheart.” I wanted to vomit. Sweetheart?! Patience?! Does he even know me? Anyway, on a better note, one of my really good friends from high school is now a marine stationed at Quantico, which is about 25 miles south of here. Let’s call him Marine Boy, MB for short MB and I actually dated off and on periodically, basically whenever I was home and we were both single, so that is a very interesting development. MB’s mom was my favorite teacher in high school, and she always tried to set us up. I’m not saying I’m romantically interested in him, but he is unique with an engaging perspective on the world. Great for deep conversations that completely blow my mind. Word on my voice mail is that we’re getting dinner tomorrow… we’ll see. Finally, there is a guy that I met while I was in D.C. over spring break. He is from Boston, so we will give him the code name “Boston Boy.” We bonded over our love for the BoSox, Samuel Adams, and writing. While I was back in Florida, he would periodically call me to check in and see how I was doing. Sweet, yeah? I thought so. Well, he called me this past weekend and wants to get together at some point. He’s going out of town the next two weekends, so I’m not holding my breath.
  • Entertainment – I finished Jane Austen’s Sense & Sensibility. I love having time to read– the real world rocks in this regard. Now I’m onto Mansfield Park, but so far it’s not doing much for me. I’m only 96 pages in, so I’m holding out that it’ll get better. I haven’t gone out around D.C. much, but my roomie and I did try out Georgetown’s waterfront for happy hour one day last week. Highly enjoyable. I’m looking forward to finding new bars– I need something to replace my favorite places from back home. Lastly, I have developed a hearty addiction to Lost. I think this is where I picked up my awful Aussie accent (hell, yeah, alliteration). I’m actually about to go watch another episode…

Hope this sufficiently updates everyone on my life thus far. I promise my posts will be more interesting/thought provoking at some time in the near future.

Cheers, mates!

Potpourri

Most nights at 7:30 p.m. you can find me watching Jeopardy! My favorite category is “Potpourri” because it makes me wonder who in the hell finds these obscure facts that have no correlation to one another. As a tribute to my favorite game show, this post will be quite the potpourri of miscellaneous thoughts.

  • David Cook won American Idol, and this pleases me. However, if I hear the sexy David Cook singing a horrific bubble-gummed over song force fed to him by those awful AI producers, I will do ungodly things. Plus, how drool-worthy did he look in that Guitar Hero commercial? So let’s get this straight, the guy is hot, can play guitar and sing, is endearing and sweet, AND has hot legs?
  • The season finale of How I Met Your Mother (yeah, I’m a HIMYM cronie, get over it) left me wanting more. I thought the show completely sucked until the last 5 minutes– anyone with me? Barney and Robin sittin’ in a tree… K-I-S-S-I-N-G. And no way in hell is Stella going to accept Ted’s proposal with an orange, stuffed giraffe. If she does, I’m exiling her from womandom.
  • Still haven’t talked to S. Okay, that’s a lie– I just sent him an e-mail, but before you break out the disapproving looks, let me tell you why. Today I leave for D.C. and tomorrow he leaves for a two week cross-country trip, which means I won’t be talking to him for that long, at least. The guy did have a big role in my life for the last 5 months and I’ve been hearing about this trip for weeks, so I though it would be a nice gesture to send him a “have-fun-please-don’t-think-I’m-a-huge-bitch” note. Bad idea?
  • Today is the Big Day, Part 1. My family and I are leaving at 2pm so that we can drive halfway to Washington, D.C. Tomorrow we’ll finish out the trek and I’ll start unloading my crap into my new apartment. This means I’ll probably be absent from the blogosphere for a while, but I will hopefully have pictures/stories the next time I write.
  • Finished Jane Eyre— loved it. It was slow at the beginning, but after that it picked up, but I can see how it might not be for everyone. Now, I’m reading Sense and Sensibility followed by another Jane Austen classic, Mansfield Park. Also, on my Bookcase page, I’ve started a star ranking system and also ask for your input, so be sure to check it out.
  • The reason for my Jane Austen obsession: The Jane Austen Bookclub. If you love books and have not seen this movie, sign off the Internet immediately and run (run, I say!) to the nearest store and rent or buy it. It’s that good.

That’s all for now!

Ciao.

American Idol Sucked Me In…

…but only because I wanted to see if David Archuleta learned how to open his eyes during the competition.

Conclusion: No, he did not.

Already Breaking One of My Rules

When it comes to blogging, I prefer posts with original thoughts instead of one that just passes information along. Unfortunately, my Florida friends are used to me showing them interesting videos or funny articles, so this blog will probably have a lot of posts where I simply prolong the life of a video that’s gone viral. Ah, c’est la vie.

I’ve been doing freelance for this amazing company for the past two weeks, and I’m basically getting paid to browse the Internet 24/7. Well, with this territory comes tons of opportunities to get sidetracked, and I stumbled on two of them this morning.

Below are two clips from last summer’s show Britain’s Got Talent, which I never watched because I’d never heard of it. This is disappointing because it features one of my fave people, Mr. Simon Cowell, as a judge.

Both of the videos feature performers under the age of 12 who are completely mind-blowing. Neither won the competition, which is a shame. Take a look for yourself– you’ll be entertained. (And I’m not just saying that because one of them performs my favorite scene from My Fair Lady…)

Now, aren’t you glad I broke a rule?